Summer brings a need for cooling off and slowing down, but also makes me want to take advantage of energy and light that the sun brings. Meditation through deliberate focus of mind and body can be in line with all of these things, but I pick what I want to try depending on my mood. Setting intention before you get focused will give you the right vibe.
Cool Feet
Fill a shallow container big enough for both of your feet with a few inches of cool water and put it on the ground. Sit comfortably in a chair and place your feet into the container. Breathe slowly. With every exhalation feel the heat from your body travel down your legs and into your feet and toes. Let that heat dissipate into the surrounding water. Repeat until the water no longer feels cool, or your feet become deliciously pruny, whichever comes first.
You can also pull a chair up to the edge of the partially-filled bathtub and use that to cool your stank feet in instead.
Sun’s Energy
Find a patch of sun outside or near a window. Get comfy and make sure you are exposing enough skin that you can feel the sun directly. Breathe with your abdominal muscles, trying to pull your breath to a point below your lungs but not quite to your belly button as you exhale. Imagine that spot as a point of bright light that collects the sun’s energy. Practice this a few times.
When you are ready, also focus on your inhale. When you breathe in do so fully, expanding your breath to reach through your limbs and neck, outward from that spot in your belly. Bloom your breath outward like a big flower, taking the current back out through your whole body. Feel the tingling as the energy you’ve collected travels to your face, hands, and feet.
If you are having a hard time getting enough sun, doing this for 15 min at a time will help you meet your quota.
Breath steeple
Sit or stand comfortably. Press your palms together, fingertips level with the bridge of your nose, but a few inches from your face. Pull your palms apart but leave your fingertips touching.
Inhale through the mouth, with a little resistance, kind of like a reverse whistle. Exhale through your nose slowly, projecting your breath into the void between your palms. Feel it escape between your fingers, warming them. Pause very slightly at the end of the exhale, enough to let the heat disappear.
Better out than in, I always say
Shrek
I hope Shrek is only talking about farts, and not reverse-whistles
Me
Three Knots
Find a string, rope, or other thingy that you can tie into knots. It should be roughly the size of a bracelet. Tie 2 knots in the string, and make the third knot when you join the ends to make a loop.
Pick three words that embody how you want to feel this summer. Sit for a minute and imagine how these words could manifest into reality.
Put the string in your non-dominant hand and roll the knots with your fingertips in succession, going around and around the loop. Use the first knot to think of your first word and what it looks like and feels like to you. Go to the next word and knot and then the last. When you are through repeat the 3 again.
You can also use a beaded bracelet/necklace, or meditation beads for this, but stick with no more than 3 focus words.
Want more meditations to practice?
Here are some other meditations to try that are good for any season:
New Years is a perfect time to set new goals, but there is something equally important about looking at your year in review. One year holds so much: successes and set backs, things to learn from and inspire you. I like to journal about my year to acknowledge the things that didn’t go well and also revisit the good in my life. Reflection can help give you direction and clarity for what you want to do next.
Read on for tips on thinking about your year, in review, or scroll down to the free journal download to get you started.
The best things that happened this year
Think about the places you went, the people you spent time with, the beautiful things you saw. Were there times you felt completely at peace? In awe? Proud? Are there particularly special photos, videos or mementos that captured these times?
Describe and elaborate on special moments to let memories surface again. I want to give my experiences the justice they warrant. Capturing the essence of positive vibes in your life boosts your happiness now and anytime you want to go back and reminisce by looking at your writings, photos, artwork, or anything else that triggers good feelings.
Double rainbows are like memories of your year in review: you get twice the fun! Memories are awesome when you experience them and again when you reminisce.
Memories can be big and grand, but they can also be small. Keeping the times that make you smile alive is worth it.
There were so many moments that made me happy this year that I might write about:
Watching the fireworks from the top of a roller coaster on a warm summer night, laughing with my kids
Taking inappropriate pictures with statues all over Philadelphia with my friends and (again) laughing
Lazy nights binge-watching Game of Thrones with my husband after the kids had gone to bed
Eating delicious things, like the creamy ube gelato I can’t stop thinking about, crisp salad fresh from my garden, or the deep pho broth I made with the last of my steer’s bones.
I could go on and on about my gelato. The point is that thinking about these memories extends the benefit you get from your best moments. So do what you can to bring them to light again; don’t let them be packed away forever in the vault of your mind.
This year’s challenges
Everybody has goals unmet, barriers uncrossed, and unwelcome setbacks. But it is possible to move past these things in order to make new plans for how you want your life to be and feel. Blowing past the negatives takes these experiences for granted and squanders any learning opportunity you might get from them.
When it rains it pours, but keep your life out of the gutter
Think about the things that didn’t go your way, but leave them in past tense–these experiences as they stand aren’t intended to be a part of your future. Even if you can’t change a negative outcome you can always reframe you attitude and have new ways for moving forward.
Acknowledge your feelings, worries, and hurts but let it be cathartic. Don’t carry the weight of bad energy into the next year. Sometimes writing things down and having a good sigh or cry is therapeutic.
Say your goodbyes to old habits and thought cycles that damaged your mood and self-worth. Make a conscious commitment to break up with the patterns that no longer suit you.
This past year I had a few stand-out struggles, as well as some disappointments. I dealt with heart issues that kept me from vigorous exercise, including my beloved long runs. I had 5 different bosses in a 9 month period, with a resulting lackluster annual review, as there was no one there to witness my accomplishments. There were arguments with my kids. My husband had to leave full time work due to a shoulder injury. But everything isn’t so bad, really. And that was this year’s issues, so it’s time to move on!
A review of the setbacks this year can be ceremonious as you move past the past. I feel more positive already, just knowing that next year won’t have the exact same problems since I have grown from my experiences.
Flat tires are like the bad stuff that happened this year: meant to be fixed so you can keep rolling.
Learning from your year and planning for the next one
In order to reframe the negatives you must give yourself credit, for being wise enough to learn from your mistakes and creative enough to come up with a new plan. I feel energized by identifying old patterns in my behavior and finding different systems that could work better.
What have you already done?
If you have already made strides for the positive, take a moment to point them out and be grateful.
Finding the gaps
What was missing your old way of thinking?
Is there new information you need? Things you must practice or study?
What behaviors need replacing?
A new plan
For every negative, think about a few positive actions you are taking (or will take) to counteract the effects. Focus on actions and habits, concrete steps you can take for the better.
Be specific about self discovery. If you’ve realized things about yourself or are curious about learning something new, state it. Be directive about who you are and where you want to be, starting now.
Look at next year as a blank slate, but take the experience and wisdom of the past forward. Be aware of ways you can build on what you have, using your strengths to your advantage.
It may feel like year in and year out your problems stay the same, but it doesn’t have to be this way. Every year has its glory days, it’s gutter balls, and it’s aha moments. But we are better for having experienced it in the first place.
Want more on your year, in review?
Try this free journal download for a more structured look a your year in review.
I also have additional posts to help with New Year’s journal ideas, from reflection to goal planning.
For those who want general advice on making your dreams a reality:
I’m lying on a hospital gurney right now, trying to distract myself and stay calm. One thing I can always do, no matter where I happen to be, is meditate. Springtime brings desire for renewal and growth, with meditation and breathwork as tools to help me along.
This past couple of weeks have been difficult for my body, but perseverating on the negatives won’t help. Sometimes the best distraction is focus. Here are a few meditation-scapes I’ve tried and would like to share:
Flower hands
Sit cross-legged or in lotus/half lotus. Lay your hands palms-up on your knees. Picture a flower in each of your palms. One is tight, like a bud, and the other is in full bloom.
Breathe deeply and slowly. With each breath the bud will expand into full flower, while the bloom in the other hand contracts. The flowers will see-saw between these states in a gentle rhythm as you breathe.
If this seems too hard to keep going, try blooming both flowers at the same time, feeling the weight of each blossom grow heavier with each breath.
Breathing wall
Stand or sit comfortably with both hands against a wall or vertical flat surface. Keep your face close enough that you can feel your breath reach the wall, but far enough away for comfort. Close your eyes. As you breathe out, focus your breath into the wall and picture the wall expanding. Feel your hands get farther apart without actually moving them. As you breathe in, feel the power of your breath pull your hands together as the wall “contracts.” Repeat. With each cycle you connect more to the wall through your breath, and then through your hands, completing a circuit of energy.
Behind the waterfall
Imagine yourself in a little mountainside cove, behind a waterfall. Picture the water coming from above and behind you, and follow it as it cascades in front of you and down below.
Feel the cool spray of water on your face and focus on one single drop on it’s journey down the mountain.
Rolling a grain of sand
Imagine a grain of sand pinched between your thumb and index finger. Roll it without dropping it. Transfer it to the next finger, and each consecutive finger, while keeping it in motion. When you get to the pinky finger, start the journey back towards the index finger.
To increase the challenge, alternate between clockwise and counter-clockwise rolling. Or, try both hands with their own grain of sand at the same time.
Birdsong echo
Sit outside or near an open window, anywhere you can hear birds chirping. If you don’t have access to natural sounds, use a recording, preferably with multiple types of bird calls.
Listen carefully to a birdsong. Replay this call in your mind 3 times, matching the pitch and rhythm carefully. Wait to hear the next distinct bird call and repeat.
With a word, symbol, or phrase you might know a company’s vision. Having a brand shows what a business represents, and what they can offer. There’s no reason you can’t have your own life brand this year, and sell yourself success with progress towards a better you. Brand your year and live your resolution for change—with a vision to guide your actions and decisions toward what you want.
Many will tell you that lasting change requires hard work, setting measurable goals, and lots of sacrifice. These things have their place in self-improvement, but they don’t sound very sexy, and might make you want to quit before you even get started with a New Year’s resolution. It can also be tough to find a goal worth working for. You might already know who you want to be, or how you wish things were different, but it is hard to articulate those things in a way that brings results. Branding is one way to put a stamp of intent on the priorities that drive you.
Develop your brand
Finding your brand requires knowing what you want out of your year. Then you can focus on the essence of that want and put it into something you can remember–this will be the standard that guides you through your decisions and actions and keeps you on track.
What do you want this New Year?
You may already have an idea of what you want, but if not there are ways to find out. Answer a few questions to get the ideas flowing:
How do you wish things were different in your life?
What are the biggest obstacles to getting what you want?
What feelings do you want to have more of? Less of?
Are there experiences you want to have or avoid?
What are your biggest priorities?
Making a statement with your goals
Now that you’ve described the desire for change, you need to find the themes and values that exemplify your goals. It may seem challenging, but there is always a common thread, something that calls to you like a beacon of change–this should be positive, motivating, and something you can be proud of.
This brand could mean different things to different people. To me it does not stand for skin bleaching or ~getting lit~. It means losing baggage, simplifying, and having fun.
My 2018 brand was “Lighten Up”. I felt weighted down with obligations and negative feelings. I wanted to declutter my life and ease some burdens, but have fun while doing so. Both the image and the statement I chose fit into my goals. This brand developed when I thought about what I didn’t want, as well as what I did. My idea was “heaviness = bad”, so what was the opposite? Lightness? It worked for me and felt right.
Your brand can be built upon a phrase, word, picture, quote/statement, or anything else that solidifies your priorities and intent. Pick something meaningful to you and your individual motivations–this has to be something that is personal to you. No one is going to be doing the work for you, and nobody else will make your decisions. This is your brand to own and develop.
Here are some ideas for picking your brand:
A song or poem that carries your theme and reminds you of what you want
A string of verbs that relay the actions you want to take
A phrase or sentence that has meaning and relevance to your plans
A picture or piece of art that embodies your ideal state
A quote that sums up your feelings or motivations
Still having problems picking something?
Try brainstorming all the words you can think of that describe the life you desire. Pick 1-3 of them as use these as a brand statement.
Write your mission for a better life a few different ways using only a sentence or two. Pick the best option as your “mission statement.”
Release your brand
Glad you’ve picked something; now make it official. Commit to this idea, no matter how you’ve chosen to represent it. This is now your mantra, so make it stick. You will want to keep the impetus for change throughout the year, so consider making reminders accessible to you. I chose both words and a visual to state my brand last year. I could refer to these later, and they helped guide my efforts.
Ideas for releasing your brand:
Screen saver (or ringtone/power-on sound) on your computer or phone
Cover for your journal, calendar, or planner. (Or an entry marking the start date.)
Title on your physical or virtual bulletin board
Post on social media announcing your year of change
Visual cue placed on your desk, wall, or nightstand
Statement to yourself as you start your new year, with reflection and thought
Whatever you do, own your choice to change and tell yourself why it is important to you. Let your brand be the guidepost for your year, and make it clear which direction you want to take.
Live your resolutions
Now that you have your brand, put it to work. It’s time to live your resolutions like you mean it, because you do. Your year now has an identity, and it’s your job to help it be what it’s meant to be. Your brand can serve your goals in different ways, so let it.
Your brand as a choice barometer
Let your brand be the standard for ideal decision-making. Measure your choices against this, and decide if they are right for you.
When confronted with taking on more projects at work this past year, I thought about whether or not the decision would fit with my goal to “lighten up!” This prevented me from taking on a few things that I maybe would’ve done automatically in the past and suffered for later.
Your brand is a reminder of what’s important to you. You’ve already made the decision to make your brand a priority, so let this decision flow into the other ones you make throughout the year. New opportunity doesn’t fit with your ideal? Maybe it’s not right for you. A decision feels right with your brand? It’s probably working for you, rather than against you!
Directions for growth
Your brand can guide you as you learn and seek new opportunities. Staying true to your brand might help you decide what books to read, people to hang out with, and activities to do. If you have a mission it is easier to choose where your energy and time should go.
I carried my brand, and what it represented, to the library with me, in my internet clicks, and on my family vacation. This let me transform my goals from ideas into action by giving me direction for growth. I wanted to learn things that would serve my intentions, and experience things that followed my vision.
This is what my brand helped me do this past year:
Perform 3 rounds of house decluttering, including a big dumpster fill at the start of the year
Take both a nature park family road trip and a much needed getaway with my friends
Make regular breaks a part of my standard work and life routine
Say no to unnecessary extra projects and hours at work
Turn down job offers that were a trade of my sanity for money (and making others happy)
Eliminate an external worry factor by erasing the news app from my phone
Try shinrin yoku, the therapeutic practice of “forest bathing”
Learn a lot about decluttering and discarding, both emotional and literal
Complete over 300 miles of outdoor street and trail running
Staying motivated
As long as your choose your brand wisely, you will be better prepared for success throughout the year. It is usually easier to stay motivated at the start of a new year than it is at the end. This is because old habits die hard, and it just isn’t fun to feel like a failure all the time. Giving up can mean self-preservation. Or, sometimes our priorities change and what feels exciting at the start gets dull and needs replacing.
What helps me is to have regular check-ins about my progress. I used my brand as a theme to help guide my journal entries throughout the year, as well as nudge me on a daily basis. I use both a free-hand journal and a Panda Planner to write down my thoughts, to-dos, and to remind me of what’s important. My Panda Planner has room for Monthly, Weekly, and Daily goals. I made sure that these fit with my brand for the year.
In the past, I have used pre-scheduled action items that fit with my overall intent. Picking one mini-goal to work on each month helps prevent things from getting stale, and lets you spread your efforts over the year.
As for habits, just remember to make your choices in line with your brand. If you want to work on specific routines, be true to your mission and be ruthless about it.
Get inspired
Although you want to keep the energy flowing for 12 more months, it is nice to take advantage of this New Year’s momentum. There is no better time to get ideas written down and talk to people about your plans.
This year, I will be making a new Pinterest board (just like last year) that gives me ideas for what I want to do. I also plan to map out some mini-goals for each month and make a list of things I would like to accomplish (in line with my new brand, of course). Visit my post New Goals, 5 Ways for more banter on fleshing out your ideas.
Just because you have a big picture plan doesn’t mean you can’t work on the details too. The brand should work like a lens that you can focus in and out of: zoom out when you need perspective and to remind yourself of what you want. Zoom in when you want to make real change by taking concrete actions that are in line with your vision
The New Year’s brand I’ve chosen this time is “I’m ready.” This should fall somewhere between the tenaciously annoying Sponge Bob version and the warrior’s strength of je suis prest (Jamie from Outlander‘s clan motto). Either way, it’s about thinking ahead and setting myself up for success on a daily basis, and in my life overall. It’s about being less reactive, more prepared, and open to new opportunities.
Here are some brands I also considered:
Making Space—carving out time, energy, and physical space for what I want to do
Level Up—taking accomplishments to the next eschelon by setting higher goals where it matters most
Hygge (the Scandinavian concept of coziness)—celebrating authenticity, relishing in simplicity and comfort, and feeling at home in my life
Where can your brand take you?
Is my life perfect after branding my year? No. Do I always stay on track with my brand and what it stands for? No, but I mostly do. Is branding my year worth it? Totally. Even though it’s nerdy and can seem overly simple, it is a technique that CAN work to help you stay on track.
Businesses have built success with their brands by knowing what they stand for and marketing appopriately. Know what you stand for. Remind yourself often. And stay true. Do these things and you have a chance at success too.
Winter can be cold, harsh, cozy, and beautiful all at the same time. It is a paradox of darkness and light, dormancy and liveliness. In my world it is mostly chaos, with the holidays, kids’ sports, and flu and pneumonia season at the hospital where I work. I need to punctuate the rushing with moments of stillness, and meditation is one way to get there.
I want to share some winter mediations that are simple and can be done even if you only have a few moments to spare. They can be done in the morning, or at night, here, there, or anywhere. In a box, or with a fox.
Snowdrift
Snow is falling in the moonlight. You are a little snow drift, sitting in the forest. Feel the gentle touch of each flake as it lands softly upon you. Although the snowflakes are light, with each breath you become heavier, a bigger mound as you grow. Imagine yourself grounded and still where you touch the earth, but also airy and light where you meet the cold air around you.
Icicles, melting
There are icicles in a row, glistening beautifully in the sun. The warmth begins to melt them. Picture a droplet forming, slowly, on an icicle. Watch as it gathers more water until it is heavy enough to trickle. Breathe out evenly as the drop slides down. Repeat.
Candle glowing
Light a candle. For a few minutes breathe lightly and watch the flame. Notice how it silently dances and wavers but stays lit. Know its intensity from the bottom, where it burns brightest, to the top, where the flame tapers into the air.
Close your eyes and see the image of this candle on the backs of your eyelids. Remember it here as you imagine yourself as that candle flame. The warmest glow is at the base of your spine: let that glow move up and around your body. Over a few breaths let that heat rise higher until it connects and tapers above your head. Feel the light and heat surrounding you, burning brighter with each breath. When you are ready, take long exhales to slowly bring the flame back down, until it finally extinguishes.
Sending love energy
Think about someone you love. This person could be sitting next to you, or be across the land or ocean from you, far away. With every breath you exhale, send your love energy to them, down through the ground and across to where they are, like the roots of a tree growing to reach them. With each inhalation, feel their energy returning to you. Let the feeling run through you as you breathe, knowing that you are loved.
The feeling of cozy
Imagine the warmest blanket wrapped around you, the comfort of your favorite hat or socks. The fabric is soft. You are soft. You have nowhere to be but here. There is no one here to judge you, nothing you must do. The only thing you feel is complete relaxation and coziness. All is right with the world.
Smell of comfort
Think back to the smells of your fondest memories. This could be the food your family cooked, the cut grass you played in as a child, or the smell of your favorite leather chair. Pick one scent that makes you feel content and safe. Imagine that smell and what was happening then as you breathe slowly. Re-feel the good emotions the memory brings.
Whether you are on a plane, on a train, in a house or with a mouse, you can be at peace with what’s around you. Practicing focus and learning to calm the inner chaos helps to temper your experience with the outer world, no matter how distracting it is.
Lately I’ve been very busy. The kind of busy that makes me forget that I’ve only put on one sock, or that I’m supposed to be in an important meeting. I’m like a pinball rolling around, randomly picking up points for just passing by, and occasionally being flipped up in yet another direction. When I catch myself feeling stressed I practice short meditation exercises to reset my body and mind.
If I focus on something, even for less than a minute, I can feel calmer and break negative thought cycles. The things I choose are typically quick to conjure and are often nature-based. Here are some that have worked to lower my heart rate and clear my brain. These are easy enough for beginners and work as fall meditations for everyone.
1 minute fall meditations
Rain on a log
Picture a campfire log that has no flames, but has been burnt, the surface ashy white with glowing red heat underneath. It has started to rain, only a sprinkle. Each time a small drop hits the log it sizzles. You smell the comforting bitter smell of wood touched by fire, feeling both the heat of the embers and cool relief as the water hits.
Leaves off a tree
A tree is above you with endless leaves falling, only a few at a time. The leaves are brilliantly colored and sway a little, whispering all at once to each other in the wind. It smells like wet leaves and sunshine. Another leaf falls and you focus on it. It floats back and forth, slowly coming down, closer to the ground. You see the leaf but you also are the leaf, feeling the gentle descent, lower and lower with each breath. Eventually you touch the ground so softly you’re not sure you’ve landed. There, on the ground atop a pillow of other leaves, you rest.
Beach body
Your body is on the shore, made of sand. The ocean crashes softly over you and pulls bits of sand away with every wave, smoothing you down into the rest of the beach. Your body disappears little by little as the water washes over you. When you are almost washed away to nothing, breathe slowly against the back of your nose, roaring like the wind, blowing the sand you have lost back to your body. Breathe like this a few more times until you are whole again. Repeat.
3-5 minute fall meditations
It’s cool
Open your window and sit in a comfortable position. Breathe slowly and deeply inward, feeling the cool air enter your lungs. Exhale completely and slowly, but keep the essence of the air with you, cooling more and more with each breath.
Hear with your forehead
Play music that is relaxing to you. Let the sound enter your ears, but pull the music toward the front of the inside of your forehead. Practice gentle half-smiling while you listen. Keep the song flowing there until it’s finished.
Thank-you word
Think of a word or phrase that represents what you are most grateful for. Take a moment to feel why this is important to you and be thankful. As you breathe in say this word or phrase silently to yourself. As you breathe out, say it aloud, slowly.
Meditations on Peanut Butter by The Lightning Bolt
The more I learn about mindfulness, the more I see it isn’t something to fear as an impossible challenge. Intention, focus, and calm are natural ways of being—I just need to practice letting myself get there. Distraction and negative rumination can be cleared away by resetting what my brain is doing, bringing me back to the here and now.
Mediation can be done by anyone, and doesn’t have to include hours of silent sitting. Little moments of calm can happen throughout the day, and should. If you have a minute (or five) to spare, you have time to practice meditation this fall, a season for slowing down and being grateful.
Instead of making a pros and cons list, try making an All-Good-Things list. This can only have positive items on it, no matter how much you want to complain about something. It can be the hopeful spin on a difficult change, a compass for decision-making, or an exercise in appreciating what you have.
My tendencies toward perfectionism and optimizing make me grieve over the little things. As in, “WTF? They put mayonnaise on my burger? I clearly asked for no mayo. Now what am I supposed to eat? Life sucks!”
Art by Poeto
When big things hit I get anxious, especially when I have to make a decision. I can hum and haw to the point where other people get annoyed, I get annoyed, and the agony of decision-making can keep me from getting lemonade out of lemons.
Recently my company restructured, and I had to make a decision: reapply for a lower-paying position with a different schedule, or quit and find something else. I decided to stay, but had to give up working alongside people I’ve enjoyed being around for over a decade. When I first heard about the restructure I was scared I would be laid off, afraid I wouldn’t get a position even if I applied. Quickly, I had gone from being happy to have a job at all to complaining about how Un-Perfect everything was. I needed perspective.
Making an All-Good-Things list is one tool I used to deal with the dissonance over this change.
All-Good-Things about being demoted
I get to befriend a new group of people.
My kids will get to spend more time with my husband when I work every other weekend.
The time I have off during the week will allow me to spend more time writing, with a much quieter house.
My pay did not get cut as much as I thought it would, and I will save money on child care.
Responsibilities for the new position seem to be short term, day-to-day tasks, so there is an opportunity for less stress.
Feel that wind? No, it’s not the hot air I’m blowing up your ass, nor the hot air blowing from my ass. It’s the wind of change, and I feel it nudging me down an exciting path, with less focus on day-job work.
I get a 3 day weekend every other week, which is awesome for camping and mini vacations.
As an hourly worker I can start making overtime again!
I get to stay at my company, close to home with a quick commute.
My job as a nurse gives me flexibility and freedom to find work in different venues and specialties. If I don’t end up liking my current position, I can always find something else.
How to make an All-Good-Things list:
Find positive things to say about your situation
Write them down
Use an All-Good-Things list to deal with change
Keeping positive vibes can be hard when life seems out of your control. It can be easy to feel like a victim, and you can pine over things you only wish were true. Fear of new challenges can be paralyzing. Making a list of the good, in whatever you’re dealing with, can help affirm your position as someone who is willing to forge ahead and find the silver lining.
Questions to ask yourself:
What about this change will be different in a good way?
Will/did you learn something new?
Is there an opportunity for growth?
Could things be worse? Are you grateful they’re not?
What tools do you already possess to get you through this?
Use an All-Good-Things list to help you make a decision
Quickly write down at least a few things that are good about each option you are considering. Go through them again when you’re done to see how you feel about each one. If you are having trouble finding good things to say about one of the options, you either don’t have enough information, or this one might not be for you.
How do the different lists make you feel? Does one option give you more feelings of excitement and optimism?
Example: to eat a mayo-covered burger or not—that IS the question.
Option #1–Just eat it
I’m still hungry
I can wipe off the mayonnaise
The food won’t go to waste
If I’m chewing I can’t simultaneously vocalize my distaste (for mayonnaise and idiots)
Option #2–Don’t eat it
I can just sit and watch the rest of my family enjoy their burgers, I guess. It’s not my fault that I was the only one born afflicted with MAS (mayonnaise aversion syndrome).
Those burger people have won the battle in pissing me off. I hope they’re happy with themselves! 😃
I guess I feel more excited about wiping the mayonnaise off and eating it. So there.
(Side note: being passive-aggressive doesn’t count as positivity. Furthermore, smiley emojis are hard to interpret when you are being sarcastic. Nobody wants a text layered with your psychological problems.)
Appreciate what you have with an All-Good-Things list
Taking time to list the rad things in your life is a mood-booster. It simply crowds out bad thoughts and attitudes. You can list things as small as the breeze on your skin, or as large as the love in your life. You can focus on the present, or reflect on the past. Be descriptive and feel each thing as you write it.
The little things
Descriptive journaling is meditative. Especially when you are trying to focus on being present and you have a difficult time deflecting other thoughts. Try to describe the sensory input you are experiencing wherever you are, from the view of a contented observer. You can write about what is here, now, and how uniquely great it is.
Almost every morning I’ve been journaling the things I am grateful for and the things I’m excited for, using my Panda Planner. It helps me start the day from a place of hope and appreciation. At the end of the day I list the things that were successful about the last 24 hours, and this helps reset crappy feelings before I go to bed.
All-Good-Things lists are like a personal coach for staying on the sunny side. There are a million lists I can make about the awesomeness in my life and in the world. Sometimes writing a few things down can remind me of that, in case I’ve forgotten. 😃
Does your life kinda stink? Maybe you need a bath—a tree bath, that is. Shinrin yoku is the practice of forest bathing, or being in the therapeutic presence of trees. To breathe near them, observe nature, use your senses, and be mindful. The shinrin yoku movement began in Japan in the 80s and has become an accepted medical treatment there and in other parts of the world. There are evidence-backed claims of health benefits, such as improved mood, blood pressure, and sleep.
The principles of shinrin yoku vary depending on your source, but are pretty simple:
Immerse yourself in nature, wherever you can find it, preferably in the company of trees.
Focus on it without artificial distraction
Let go of agendas, time, and expectations
Use your senses to observe what’s around you
I have decided to try it and see how it feels. The forest is always a rejuvenating place for me. Living in the Pacific Northwest has given me the opportunity to be near the best trees in the world and incredible areas of natural beauty. Many of my sweetest memories are intertwined with my experiences outdoors.
I respect the majesty of trees and believe they give us so much more than cocktail toothpicks, wooden marionettes, and toilet paper. They are like the sentinels of nature, standing tall, guarding and bearing witness.
Trees aren’t as simple as they seem: they communicate with each other in mysterious ways, via electricity, chemicals in the air, and fungi underground. They have networks and depend on each other for survival. We are guests when we visit them, but yet we need them too, as they are a part of our story, and us now a part of theirs.
Snow-covered fir trees line the road to my first shinrin yoku experience.
The science of our own place in nature is complicated. We typically think of ourselves as special and separate from the rest of the ecosystem. But the interdependence we have with other living things, with the world outside, is devastatingly underrated. The way we’ve upset that balance has wronged ourselves and our earth. I am intrigued by how humans are meant to rely on other living things to optimally survive, and how we can go about restoring some of that lost balance. Being in nature, where humans have always lived until recently, is probably what’s missing from our plastic-y, artificially lit, indoor lives.
Shinrin yoku sounds like a good way to connect with myself, the trees, the rest of the forest, and to see what it does for my own balance, mood and sleep. For a week I practiced shinrin yoku, near home and away, in the sun and in the snow, and during both day and night. Here is an account of my experience.
Away in the snow, with shinrin yoku day and night
Friday, 7:45 pm: People…people who need people. And glamping in the trees.
I planned a camping trip in the foothills of the Coast Range in western Oregon, amidst the trees of a dense Douglas fir forest. I’ve made it to my camping spot and the ground is covered in a slush of snow that’s been rained upon. We planned this spring break trip months ago, but didn’t expect it to be so cold. Or wet. Snow this late in the year isn’t typical.
We’ve decided to make the best of it and enjoy our soggy outing. We set up canopies outside the trailer, covered our fire wood, and went into the toasty interior of our apartment on wheels to hang out (only after the kids became thoroughly saturated). I guess it’s more like glamping than roughing it if your accommodations are nicer than your actual house.
Is it actually camping if you can take a hot shower and keep your fancy yogurt in the refrigerator?
Now we’re watching The Lorax on our camping flat screen, and this movie happens to fit the theme of my trip: trees. Instead of speaking FOR the trees, I want the trees to speak TO me. I’ve decided I’m going into the woods to formally try shinrin yoku in the morning.
Because we are the kind of family that sometimes watches a little tv while enjoying nature (and parks a mobile house on the side of our home in the name of camping), we probably desperately need time in the trees. To unplug, decompress, be silent, and breathe in the high-quality forest air.
Saturday, 9:35 am: Forest sense
I woke up with a bad headache—possibly due to the modern comforts of forced air heat, blasting into my sinuses as I slept. Snow fell throughout the night while my furnace roared, leaving some of the trails impassable. After an egg and pancake breakfast I headed out, with my friend D and her dog, to be with some trees. Shinrin yoku encourages use of your senses. I tried to focus and pay attention.
The view from a clearing in the snow-covered woods
👀Sight: Dark evergreen boughs capped with beautiful snow. The sapling babies of spring, chilled and new at our feet, looking lost and small. Brightness amplified with white all around.
👂🏽Sound: Quiet water tricking everywhere and nowhere as the snow melts and stealthily joins its friends downhill. The crack of branches, giving with a heavy burden. Flakes fall like a million whispers.
🤚Touch: Cold becomes a part of you as you invite it in, breathing deeply. The snow crunches in a satisfying way with each step—you can feel the sureness of your footing. Trees shelter and give off a slight warmth as you pass closely.
👃🏻Smell: The familiar sweetness of forest is here today, but smoother in the chill than usual, as it is cut with the frosty clean scent of pure snow. A bank of trees that has been recently logged smells strongly of fir, which reminds me of good things from my past all at once—Christmas trees, shop class, songs by firelight, and our old wood stove.
I was hoping the trees would cure my headache. It was still there, but I was definitely more calm and a little happier. Upon returning to camp I got a hankering for a long satisfying nap, which I took, snuggled with my Baby Son.
The trees are telling us we are on our own and to shinrin yoku at our own risk.
Saturday, 10:45 pm: Who’s on night watch?
The first tree bath of the day was great, but I just had to try it in the dark. Another friend was game this time. After a few carne asada tacos, a bottle of local ale, and good campfire conversations, again I left, with my 15-month old strapped to my chest. We set out just as the twilight sky was lavender and warned us of darkness.
The forest took on a different feel in the dark. The trees were done standing watch for us, and told us we were on our own. If the day was our time, this was theirs. Somehow things seemed more alive as the sun set.
These young trees were green and bright and slapped us across the face as we rounded corners of the dark trail.
Greenery was bright in our headlamps. Branches popped out of nowhere. The trail seemed smaller and the trees seemed bigger. I still felt welcome as a guest, to this time bear witness for the trees. They thanked us for our visit and after an hour or so we felt the need to get back to our people and our own home base.
The daylight trip made me want to sleep, but the nighttime one energized me. I returned to the company of family and friends, to sit around the fire some more (and s’more) staying up late, having fun.
The pros
Love, love, love being in the forest. Paying close attention to your senses makes the experience more intense, and gives you a better respect and understanding for the trees and the rest of the living things around you. Both day and night trips give the forest a magical ambiance when you let your invasive thoughts fade away.
The air is fantastic. It smells great, it feels great, and I wonder what exactly those beneficial compounds that trees emit do. Breathing in the forest is the best part.
Shinrin yoku is rejuvenating and peaceful. The opportunity to try this in the deep, snowy woods was incredible.
Being with the trees is a privilege, and one I don’t want to take for granted. Having access to the wonder of the forests is special and I am grateful.
The cons
Recommendations are to wander aimlessly at a leisurely pace with shinrin yoku, but in a remote area I had a hard time with both. I get lost very quickly, and I have to eventually come home safely. I ended up walking at a good pace at times, with purpose. So, yeah, it was like a hike.
Want to take someone along so you’re not alone in the woods? It is very difficult not to talk, especially if you are with friends that you need to catch up with. I kept wanting to break silence, especially to make noise to warn cougars away from my baby during the dark walk.
It’s pretty hard to focus in a dark, unfamiliar place, due to instincts to avoid danger. This makes it hard to fully relax during the night.
Shinrin yoku in the Sunday sun, with the trees outside my door
Sunday, 2:45 pm: In my own backyard
We arrived home from camping today to find it mostly sunny and warm. The plan was to unpack and relax for the rest of the day. But then my yard got all jacked up from trying to park and re-park the heavy trailer on soggy ground.
I had to back fill all these ruts by hand with my hoe.
Then my Baby Son got into the barbecue grease when I wasn’t looking. Hope he doesn’t get diarrhea. He smeared this everywhere.
Needless to say I was exhausted and stressed after all this, so I decided to do shinrin yoku in my own yard in an attempt to take it down a notch.
I have 10 trees and shrubs on my property. I wandered and focused on their individuality, trying to be present, getting a sense for each on their own. This was calming and it was good to check in on my plants, seeing how spring was changing them so far.
The camellia is starting to bloom
No leaves yet, but this tree is happy against the blue sky
A boxwood hedge is always green and ready for some front yard shinrin yoku
Pros:
The trees in your yard, street, or neighborhood are completely available, with quick access.
Seeing something as new that you are used to looking at is rad.
Peering at the small details of any plant is fascinating, and something we don’t do enough of—I can’t usually see my yard for the trees.
Cons
It’s hard not to want to prune or start yard projects when looking at your own plants. This is not a calming feeling, so you have to push past it.
Depending your nearest outdoor space, your choices may be limited.
I had never noticed how beautiful the bark of my tree was, with lichen and moss in different colors…a little forest on its own.
Trees in the city park, family style
Tuesday, 5:05 pm: “I don’t wanna take a tree bath!”
Pokemon, Go!..take a shinrin yoku tree break from your tablet or smartphone.
My kids are off school for the week, and it is easy to get lazy and crazy inside the house. We had spent the good part of the day curled up in my bed binge-watching Gortimer Gibbons, making bead necklaces, and doing my taxes. Suddenly I felt the shinrin yoku itch and dragged them to a city park, with the bargain of taking them to the swings after some tree time. They were like, “I don’t wanna take a tree bath!” Well, tough turds.
I think I’m really starting to dig lichen. How cool are the colors and stripes on this tree?
We ambled down the paths and touched rocks, listened for bullfrogs, and found stripes of colorful sap and lichen on bark. Some of the paths were flooded, but we discovered a new one we hadn’t been on before as we wandered, seeing trees that were usually submerged underwater, looking dead and spooky.
The kids liked their tree bath, whether they want to admit it or not.
Pros:
Easy to do, safe to actually wander around aimlessly in a controlled space.
Family-friendly. Parks are usually made with accessibility in mind. There are paved paths for strollers, wheelchairs, and bikes, and groomed areas to sit and observe nature.
Cons:
City parks can have all kinds of distractions, like traffic noise, homeless camps, and views/smells of the sewage treatment plant between the trunks.
Not as peaceful as remote forests. There are other people you have to share the space with.
This city park is adjacent to what my kids lovingly call “The Poop Factory”, aka the wastewater treatment facility.
A pause for nature on a busy day
Thursday 8:15 pm: She works hard for the shinrin yoku
My day was filled with meetings, phone calls, and pissing on small dramatic workplace fires. I only got a 15 minute lunch and the day went by like lightning. Before I knew it I had been there for almost 14 hours in a windowless space. I needed to transition to a more peaceful state, and seek the normalcy of nature.
I found an awesome tree in bloom on my way to the parking garage. The goal: to get rid of stress and naggy thoughts so I could go home and be fully present with my family. It is already becoming easier to focus after a week with shinrin yoku. I could feel myself relax quickly as I looked at the glow of the tree in the fading light, smelled the blossoms, and breathed deeply. With an investment of only a few minutes I felt a lot better.
The pros:
Doing a workplace shinrin yoku quickie can help you decompress before, during, or after work. Finding a spot to enjoy a little slice of nature can help normalize your stressful day.
Being mindful during a busy time is easier with external cues in the beauty of nature.
The cons:
If you are stuck inside like I am for your work day, you may have to venture outside on your break or bring plants inside to practice this.
Colleagues and campus security may be concerned by your loitering, deep tree sniffing, and the intensity of your gaze. Be prepared to make urine for “random” drug testing. (Hope you haven’t used it all up pissing on fires.)
Shinrin yoku experiment: the findings
Mood
Shinrin yoku is amazing for my mood, even in the short term. This mindfulness technique is spot on. It is a good way for beginners to find focus, since trees are usually easy to find and sensory input is straightforward. After each session I found myself returning to feelings of calm by remembering what I practiced.
When driving, I find myself glancing at the trees as I speed by, and for a second I feel that blip of peace. That’s what I’m looking for: a new habit of calm, carrying the feelings I get from mindfulness throughout my day.
We are drawn to nature because we are a part of it. Letting ourselves have the space and time to be present with the world is something we were born to do. Stop fighting it already.
Health
My camping tree bath did nothing for my headache, but I can see how this calming practice could be good for mitigating inflammation. I know my breathing and heart rate did slow with calmness.
The breathing aspect of shinrin yoku itself is key to bringing your body to the present. If you are able to try this in the deep forest or an untouched natural area you will be rewarded with the sweetest, cleanest, loveliest air. If you do nothing else in the woods, you must appreciate this in a world with fewer places to experience the air we were made to breathe.
Exercise, no matter how mild, is good for you—and you may get a dose, depending on your excursion. The focus of shinrin yoku is not to work out, but it can fit into an active, nature-loving lifestyle.
Sleep
Night was energizing, but day shinrin yoku made me either nap or have a slightly better time falling asleep. Mindfulness is known to be good for sleep, but I didn’t have enough of a trajectory to appreciate the full effects. Maybe daytime tree bathing is better for sleep than night due to sunlight exposure, and nighttime alertness (with an instinct to avoid danger in an unfamiliar place) can amp people up. Who knows, maybe the trees give off different chemicals during the night hours that can affect us? I need to try sitting still in the dark with a tree in a safe place sometime.
Long term practice
Sniffing trees and having an agenda when out in nature can seem a little hokey and “out there”, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Simply being mindful and appreciative of our natural world is what shinrin yoku is about. Immersing the mind, body, and spirit in the world around us is more normal than other common things people do, like intently choosing selfie filters on a smartphone, or watching other people experience nature through a TV set.
I liked trying shinrin yoku. The principles and techniques will probably stay with me as I seek more experiences in the peace of the outdoors. Forest bathing doesn’t have to be formal or grand, and I think focusing on nature is something anyone can do, no matter the scale. From a flower in a vase to a dense forest, find it and feel calm.
The benefits of shinrin yoku are rooted in stress relief and leafing your worries behind (pun and pun intended). If you bark up the right tree, you might find something worth keeping in your tool kit for living, so give tree bathing a try. Or at least look for a long, hard minute at your houseplants.
Waning motivation is something we all can relate to. It is the universal factor in giving up or backing away from something we’ve started.
Have you ever?
Started a project with gusto and then eventually abandoned it
Experienced resentment toward a process that once gave you joy
Felt like a failure for not being able to see something through
Realized that you haven’t done ______ in a long time, but can’t remember why you stopped
Wondered why you can’t stick with a plan long enough to see results
This is what my garden looks like when I still haven’t given up completely. Don’t look at my crunchy grass. I conserve water on purpose. Life’s a garden. Dig it.
Every year when spring is approaching I get very excited to garden. As soon as I have a sunny day to tease me I start planning, nerding out over seed selections and making planting diagrams. My motivation climbs until the seeds are in the ground, and it holds until I start harvesting.
Then my motivation wanes. Slowly but surely I get sick of eating the same beans or going out to weed. Instead of a lovely green garden it starts to look more like the wild scraggly stuff that grows on the sides of highway on-ramps. I look out my window and vow to do something about it. It can feel like such a chore depending on my mood.
By mid-fall I might have completely lost initiative to clean it up or get it prepped for the winter. This year I left it ugly and abandoned, and I feel bad about it. I gave up. I didn’t have what it takes to finish something. Spring Me gets pissed that I let oregano go to seed everywhere, and that I didn’t mulch with wet leaves or compost properly.
Oregano couldn’t help himself when he felt lonely and neglected.
Does it matter?
Everybody needs to feel accomplished. Some are better at brushing off the loss of things that no longer interest them. If I continued everything I ever started, stuck with every dream, I could be married to Michael Jackson (or Michael J Fox) and still adding garbage pail kids to my pegacorn sticker album.
My hopes, dreams, and stickers: 1984 to infinity x infinity
Sometimes the effort is better spent on new projects, and other times getting back on track makes more sense. Either way, decide to do something. Letting unfinished business fester contributes to stress and inhibits progress.
What to do about waning motivation?
Get over it and move on
If you want to move on to another project you should close the door on the thing you are done with. This doesn’t mean you can’t change your mind later and reopen it, it just means you aren’t letting the worry of something in limbo bug you. Freeing up time, mental space, energy, and initiative gives strength to what you choose to take on next.
Hit the pause button
Alternatively, you can get to a good stopping point that allows you to pick back up where you left off when the timing is better. Just make sure this dormant state low maintenance, or you may up resenting it.
We have decided to put our bathroom remodel on hold because we diverted the funds to something else. Until then, I have also decided not to care.
Find a win
If you haven’t been seeing results for your efforts, and this makes you want to give up, plan to focus on something that will give you a psychological boost for the time being. This can be “low hanging fruit”, or something that pleases the senses and gives you a feeling of accomplishment. Playing the long game can seem toooo long.
Examples include:
Pick something that will give you a visual reminder of your goal: this can be something like a tracker or inspiration board, or something tangible you’ve actually completed.
Plan a social event or celebration surrounding your hard work
Pick something you’ve been looking forward to and attach it to completing a phase of work (like, “we will finish paying off our credit card bill before we start summer break”)
Adjust your reward
When dealing with a big project or goal, focus on an angle that gives you the most bang for your buck. The thing that gave you impetus yesterday won’t necessarily be your favorite today, so let your rewards shift as needed.
When I first started running, my goal was to lower my blood sugar. Although this is still important to me, in the short term I find myself looking forward to the way I’ll feel after running, as well as getting to listen to podcasts uninterrupted. My previous post, 13 Tips for Getting Over the Hump of the Exercise Hill, tells more about finding wins and rewards.
Remind yourself why and immerse yourself in it
Even the best things in life can go stale or become forgotten. Regular maintenance and work are required to keep us going in every way, even when we’re having fun. Consciously showing yourself what your goals mean to you and revisiting your initial motivations and feelings can spark positive mojo.
Getting excited again can be as simple as:
Reminiscing about falling in love with the idea that started your journey
Seeking more information on how to do more, better
Connecting with others who support you and can offer insight
Work in pieces
Big projects are daunting. When it feels too overwhelming, mini goals are needed. Set milestones to complete and put everyday things on your to-do lists that support reaching them.
Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither are six pack abs
Tending this little berry patch can work as an easy win and is a small milestone to complete that will make me feel like I’m doing something in the garden. Might even motivate me to keep pruning.
Outsource
Grunt work can ruin the fun of getting what you want, so con someone else into doing the heavy lifting for you. Also, paying someone to do things necessary to your goal (that you don’t have the motivation, knowledge, or time to do) can be just what you need to make progress.
Examples include:
Hiring a personal trainer to customize your workouts
Taking a class to learn something you’ve always wanted to do
Finding childcare, or hiring an assistant at work, so you can get uninterrupted time to focus on a project
Forcing your kids to do the loathed garden chores aforementioned in this article
Child labor from my 2 oldest sons was used to help me complete all the weeding, composting, and mulching. Now the garden is finally in a proper resting state.
Looking ahead
The fear of losing motivation later can stop us from starting at all. Having a plan in place for the ebb and flow of motivation can help keep you from giving up, or can help you let go without regrets. Again, whatever you do, do something!
Post Holiday shopping is here. Yes, you may get a good deal on some wrapping paper for next year, but more likely you are focused on something else. People who shopped, ate, and stressed their way into oblivion are trying to reset, and are looking for external cues to tell them how to spend their money to fix it.
😍: I’m having urges.
😏: Oh, yeah?
😍: Uncontrollable urges.
😏: OhYeah!
😍: Uncontrollable urges to stop by the store and buy things that make me feel organized and skinny.
😐: Oh. Yeah.
New Years resolutions are born out of the hedonism of the prior weeks. Your house may already be full from gifts you received (or bought yourself since there were so many “deals” available). But your urge to shop may not be over. Retailers are waiting to pounce as you feel the need to get organized, eat better, and put the holidays behind you. There is always another season ahead where you might find a void in your life to fill with stuff.
Here are the next things you might spend your money on:
Fitness equipment or clothing for all the exercise you’ve promised yourself
Food, vitamins, and supplements for your new healthy diet
Huge plastic totes to store your holiday decorations and the crap you accumulated over the last month or two
Home décor for un-Christmasing your living room since you feel the need to look at something less festive
Look! Valentines stuff is out. Must be time to buy candy to make sure people still feel loved. I don’t see any candy canes, so it must be different than the 20 lbs of candy I have eaten in the last 4 weeks.
We want to be sold to because we want change this time of year. It is easy to bend to the pressures of advertising and social norms that nudge us into the next sales cycle. Companies are adept at making us feel that combo of guilt over what we’ve done, and hope that we can make better choices than before. And be someone new and improved.
This year I am trying to reconcile that urge to be a different, healthier me with the need to be the same me, who wears the same work out pants as last year and makes smoothies in the same blender with the broken but functional lid. My inevitable weakness is that I feel that void, the chasm between who I am and that ideal self, who surely got fit because she had a new pair of running pants and a high-powered Vita-mix.
Efforts this time of year can get misplaced and go toward shopping for health paraphernalia rather than spending time actually preparing healthy foods or exercising. It is always easier to FEEL like we are bettering our lives with things we buy instead of actually changing habits, routines, or attitudes.
Shopping substitutes
It’s so cute that we want to do something positive, but shopping is the easy part. We love to search for things that might be useful or edible. Shopping works well naturally with the human need to gather and hunt, and nowadays we can do this while lying in bed, wearing a sleep mask and bossing Alexa around. If you aren’t ready to be completely enlightened and free from desire there are ways to use your gathering and searching instincts to do something other than buying stuff.
Shop your own pantry and challenge yourself to make as many meals as possible before having to grocery shop again. There are websites that let you search recipes by ingredients on hand.
Shop your library for a movie, book, or whatever that you want to get into. Pick something that fills your hole. (In your soul.) Read up on a subject that makes you feel like you are making progress. Learn something new.
Use your gifts. Like, literally. Use the things you’ve been gifted but haven’t had a chance to enjoy. Take a candlelit bath with the 27 scented candles you’ve accumulated while drinking the wine you got as a holiday hostess gift. Use gift cards or supplies you have for experiences, such as the spa gift card I’ve been hoarding since last Christmas.
Rearrange your furniture and find things from outside to bring in as décor. Or, find stuff from other rooms in the house that can be repurposed.
Take on a crafting or home improvement project that you’ve been putting off but already have most of the supplies to complete.
Reducing the urge to search and shop
I actually hate shopping at the store, but I do love searching. I think I crave the mindlessness of paying half-attention to lists of things that are of little consequence at the moment, but give the illusion of making progress. And there is nothing inherently wrong with entertaining myself. But I feel the most fulfilled when I am actually doing something, especially if I am experiencing moments of flow, or if I am being present with people I love. Maybe I am ready to take it to the next level, and increase my happiness.
Things to try:
Practice mindfulness, everyday.
Focus on removing unnecessary items and obligations in my environment and routines.
Put myself on a media budget to reduce exposure to advertising.
Cultivate energy and reserve time for creating, doing, and connecting.
Deliberately reduce time used for the pursuit of things, necessary or not.
Choose a life that doesn’t need escaping from.
Maybe I’m wrong, and shopping weakness is not inevitable. With each passing yearly micophase, and its corresponding sale cycle, I feel my reserve getting stronger. My focus is subtly changing to gratitude for each little opportunity to experience something different as the seasons roll into the next.
😍: I’m having urges.
😏: Oh, yeah?
😍: Uncontrollable urges.
😏: OhYeah!
😍: Uncontrollable urges to put myself on a media budget so I can focus on our relationship, so turn off the TV.
